Saturday, January 11, 2014

3 Things no one tells you when you switch from contacts to glasses

Ignore the crappy photo of me trying to look presentable in my glasses. It was taken on my kindle, and is beyond pixelated all to hell.
So, after 10 years without a back-up pair of glasses, I finally decided it was time to get some for those days when my contacts are bothering me. Let em tell you, after such a long period of time, there were a LOT of things I didn't remember about wearing glasses, and I thought I would share them with you, in case you decide to take the plunge and change up your eyewear as well.

1.) You Better Get Used To Living Like A Fish

Stock photo from stock-gallery
 Now, I don't remember ever feeling like I was trapped in a fishbowl with my last pair of glasses, but the second I took out my contact, and put on my new glasses for the first time, there was a severe sense of being trapped in a tiny spherical glass prison. It was so bad in fact, I literally just sat down and did nothing but stare out of my glasses, trying to get used to them. Even after wearing them all last night, and all day today, I'm still bothered by the curve I see out of the corner of my eye. I know I just have to get used to them, but if you plan to be constantly be switching from contacts to glasses, the fishbowl effect will never go away...so just be ready to feel like Nemo trapped in the aquarium around the clock.

2.) You Will No Longer Have Any Sort Of Depth Perception


My depth perception wasn't the greatest with contacts, but when I put on my glasses, any sort of talent I had for not running into things flew out the window. I can no longer gauge where I am in conjunction to solid objects. I've run into the doorway between the living room and kitchen twelve times today.

Twelve.

And it's not just walking, oh no. You should have seen me trying to wash the dishes earlier. The sponge was not where my brain said it was, so I was groping about trying to get a knife to wash without cutting my hand because my eyes said I was grabbing the handle, but my hand said, "THAT'S THE BLADE FUCKTARD."

3.) You Get To Living In A Poorly Color Screened Comic.

Image from White Rabbit 3d
Just a warning, if you don't look out of the EXACT CENTER of the lenses, you will get to experience what it's like to revisit those old comics with the bad color bleeding from poor alignment during printing. I'm just so used to glancing out the corner of my eye at something, and the fact that I now have to turn my entire head in order to look at something has me annoyed to no end. I can't be sly and just sneak a peek at something any more, I have to be blatantly obvious tot he fact that I'm looking at something.

What if I want to sneak a peek at the trainwreck of a woman having a meltdown in Starbucks because they ran out of her favorite creamer? Or have a nonchalant glance at the two drag queens having one of the most intriguing discussions about "potatoes" I have ever heard?

No...now I have to stare with a deer in the headlights look.

So be warned, if you switch from contacts to glasses, your ninja like snooping skills will be completely lost to you forever.

Love and Lightning Bugs,
  Photobucket

24 comments:

Ronnie said...

Thank God I have good eyesight because I don't think I could handle glasses or contacts on a daily or permanent basis. Everything you describe above is exactly what happens to me when I try on other people's glasses out of curiosity..

Kiittäkää Aina ja Kaikesta said...

Sounds like you've had a bad day. I feel for you about the depth perception, I have trouble with it also. And it migh be the reason why you bump into things. At least it does that for me. But at least the glasses look good on you.

Hobbies on a Budget said...

That's almost funny if it weren't for the fact that you are talking about real experience here. Sorry you're having a rough time. I can't wear contacts. I can barely even put in eye drops at the eye doctor. Nemo huh? That's rough! and 12 times? Better invest in some pads and shin guards! Hope it gets easier!

Masshole Mommy said...

I had no idea. I wear glasses, but have never even considered contacts. I assumed they were the same.

Anonymous said...

I wear glasses and the only time that I've experienced anything like this was when my prescription was wrong or I picked a pair of frames that weren't right for my face. This reaction you're having isn't the norm Sweets. I suggest you go back to your eye-doctor for some guidance and maybe another quick checkup. Wishing you lots of luck! <3

Unknown said...

I think it's because I've been wearing only contacts for 10 years. My eyes just never get a chance to adjust, because I'm only wearing glasses when I take my contacts out at night.

Megan said...

HAHA this is great. I've worn glasses for 3 years now and am finally used to them. I tried contacts...several different brands...and they don't stay in place on my eyeball! They constantly spin around and make me blink so much I look like I have some neurological disorder. I figured I would stick with the glasses instead. =)

Unknown said...

A few years ago I was told by my doctor to stop wearing contacts because my eyes were just too dry and irritated all the time, even though I did the tear drops and all that. After a year with glasses, I bit the bullet and had laser eye surgery. Love it!

Gluten Free for Jen said...

How true this is! I alternate between my glasses and contacts- I will wear my glasses for part of a day every couple of months type of thing and I still get all of those affects.

Unknown said...

I'm still getting used to wearing my glasses, however I did try wearing contacts. That lasted for about 24 hours lol.

debdenny said...

I will keep this all in mind, since I may have to get glasses soon.

Anonymous said...

I wear glasses now, but used contacts in the past, the contacts just irritate me like crazy, co I stuck with the glasses

jesicaj1 said...

You must have worse vision than I did before my lasik. I never had problems with my glasses and hated contacts. :-)

Maria said...

I am not a good canidate for contacts. I never knew those things could happen. I would love to have lasiks but not available to me either.

The AnnMarie John said...

I don't wear glasses or contacts. I actually have 20/15 vision except when I'm experiencing one of my migraines, then I have barely any vision at all.

FabulousPerks said...

Ha, I wear both and I know exactly what you mean. Wearing contacts is such a great feeling. It hurts my soul when I have to wear my glasses. I envy those that has good eyesight. Lol

Chubskulit Rose said...

I guess you got used to and got so comfortable with contacts that wearing an eyeglasses is awful. I am used to wearing glasses so when I tried contacts, it was uncomfortable so I went back to using eyeglasses lol. You will get used to it.

Alyssa McVey said...

I've been wearing glasses for 17 years and contacts on and off since then. There's only one brand of contacts I can wear due to sensitivity. But the post made me laugh! It's so true. It's an odd feeling switching from one to the other.

Casa Vilora Interiors said...

Thankfully I don't need glasses. My daughter does so I will have to pass this along

Annemarie said...

WOW I am surprised - I went to glasses and now I would never ever go back to contacts,

Pam said...

LOL, funny post! Loved it! I just wear reading glasses right now but I have to have them on almost all the time. I am at 300 already. Yikes! I have progressive lenses actually on a prescription pair and I can't tolerate them. For all the reasons you mentioned above.

I love the ones you picked. They look great on you!

Unknown said...

I wear a mix of the two. In the morning I always get lost as I can't find my glasses... so then with mushy eyes that need more sleep, i put in contacts.. then they hurt.

Melanie said...

Thanks for sharing, now I totally understand what my son ment the other day, he had to wear glasses for a few days till I was able to get him contacts... I had no idea..loved reading your post.

Cheap Is The *New* Classy said...

I don't wear glasses, so I find it crazy that something that is supposed to help your vision makes it worse {at least for a little bit}. My husband says that when he first got glasses he had a depth perception problem, too, and felt like he was going to step through the floor!