Monday, March 10, 2014

I Don't Need This Today

WELL, today must just be a day of snark and bitchiness in the world.

Not only did I have to deal with a not so nice email from a contact at a corset company I was pitching, The Burgandy Boudoir (who I really don't suggest you do any work with based on the sheer amount of snark and arrogance I got out of one e-mail), but my dog decided that she was going to pretty much ignore my entire existence.

Me: "Jessi..."

Jessi: ...

Me: "Jessi."

Jessie: ...

Me: "JESSI!!"

Jessi: *Looks up* "Were you addressing me human?"

Me: "Yes, I was addressing you, you senile old woman. Will you please move, you're in my way, and I can't get to the sink."

Jessi: *Lays head back on paws*

Me: "Jessie...come one now. I need to do the dishes."

Jessi: *Blinks, yawns, and rolls over on her side* No.

Me: "Jessi, just do me a solid. I really need to get the dishes done."

Jessi: *Turns her head away, and begins an amazing imitation of a rock*

Me: *tries to dance to get her attention, whistles, pats her head, opens the fridge door*

Jessi: *No movement*

Me: "Ugh...fine. Lay there on the hard linoleum floor. I'm going in the other room until you stop being so catatonic"

Jessi: *No Movement*

Me: *Walking in the other room, mumbling* Crazy old senile Border Collie....

Jessi: "I heard that human!"

Ugh...what can you do?

Love and Lightning Bugs,

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